As I write this post, I feel I need to have a disclaimer: I am not trying to talk badly about anybody who chooses to use an anonymous messaging service. I mean, whenever you want to do is your prerogative. If you are my friend, I love you regardless. But, I wanted to give my opinion, b cause, that's what the internet is for...rite?
It seems that there has been a lot of controversy over this new anonymous messaging service and I've been thinking a lot about it. It's called Sarahah and I think it started somewhere in the Middle East and spread through Europe. It's messaging service where you can sign up as a user and put a link out there and your friends or the general public can comment to you anonymously.
As I understand it, originally it was created as a way for employers to receive feedback from their employees anonymously. I get why this would be a thing. I mean, I'm not always 100% comfortable about telling my boss exactly how I feel about some things. My company, or at least my boss, is fairly open and I do feel that I can provide my opinion on the big things, but when it comes to stuff like promotions or if I really really hate something, I don't want to sound too negative because I don't want it to sound like I'm not motivated in the job or that I want to quit. Even recently, I have seen how a certain employee could be very open with their negative feelings about the company as a whole and yet they still don't get fired on the spot. However, I know that most companies aren't like this, and some employees fear too much for their jobs that even say anything remotely critical could compromise their position.
Therefore, I can see how a service like this for a company could be really useful. It could gauge employee happiness, it could note where there are improvements to be made or it could be ensure you that you're not doing such a bad job with your company after all.
Recently, Sarahah has gotten new life in social media for people that are not in an employee/employer relationship. You an even old get feedback from people you don't even know like, if you say, write a blog for instance. And honestly, in that case, it might be nice because I feel like my friends may not want to come out super negatively on my Facebook, and maybe even here on Blogger it they disagree with something that I'm writing. I mean, I don't really care if you say negative shit because one of my big goals of this blog is to get a convo going so if civility can reign, I'm totally ok with it. If you're going to throw that out the window and just be a troll, then you will just get your comment deleted and I may reconsider my respect for you.
Now, let's talk socially. I'm a fairly frank and upfront person (wait...really?). If you're being a little punk and it's enough that I feel that it will affect me, I will say something to you. And if I disagree with you, I will find a way to politely let you know how I feel IF I want to talk about it. If I'm not willing to talk, I will just shut the fuck up.
If you are just bothering me, I weigh the benefits of saying anything or just letting it go. Usually the criteria consist of one of two things:
1. Will my saying something really help this person or improve my relationship with this person?
2. Does it really need to be said or will it just cause more trouble if I speak up?
Generally the first one would be, for instance, if someone gets a really bad haircut or if their perfume is overpowering. And even in these cases, I would weigh my feedback with their feelings. Do they seem on the fence about their haircut and my feedback will help them determine if they're going to do it again? Then yes, I may say that it's not their best haircut. But...Are they super in love with it and just fucking adore it? Then no, I'm not going to shit on their dreams.
For the second bullet point, I generally only do those things if I may not be too worried about the friendship with being retained because a person has crossed so far into my no bullshit on that I just don't care anymore or b. If they are being directly ticket to me. If someone is being a cunt to me I will tell them that they're being a cunt. And a third a bonus point, I have something good to say to you, then I'm going to tell you. Even if the thing is that I'm super jelly because you are so much more beautiful and successful than me and I kind of hate you sometimes. Because, honestly, my friend to know me should know that's a compliment. And my friend to get too sensitive? Maybe I should rethink having them as friends.
It seems that there has been a lot of controversy over this new anonymous messaging service and I've been thinking a lot about it. It's called Sarahah and I think it started somewhere in the Middle East and spread through Europe. It's messaging service where you can sign up as a user and put a link out there and your friends or the general public can comment to you anonymously.
As I understand it, originally it was created as a way for employers to receive feedback from their employees anonymously. I get why this would be a thing. I mean, I'm not always 100% comfortable about telling my boss exactly how I feel about some things. My company, or at least my boss, is fairly open and I do feel that I can provide my opinion on the big things, but when it comes to stuff like promotions or if I really really hate something, I don't want to sound too negative because I don't want it to sound like I'm not motivated in the job or that I want to quit. Even recently, I have seen how a certain employee could be very open with their negative feelings about the company as a whole and yet they still don't get fired on the spot. However, I know that most companies aren't like this, and some employees fear too much for their jobs that even say anything remotely critical could compromise their position.
Therefore, I can see how a service like this for a company could be really useful. It could gauge employee happiness, it could note where there are improvements to be made or it could be ensure you that you're not doing such a bad job with your company after all.
Recently, Sarahah has gotten new life in social media for people that are not in an employee/employer relationship. You an even old get feedback from people you don't even know like, if you say, write a blog for instance. And honestly, in that case, it might be nice because I feel like my friends may not want to come out super negatively on my Facebook, and maybe even here on Blogger it they disagree with something that I'm writing. I mean, I don't really care if you say negative shit because one of my big goals of this blog is to get a convo going so if civility can reign, I'm totally ok with it. If you're going to throw that out the window and just be a troll, then you will just get your comment deleted and I may reconsider my respect for you.
Now, let's talk socially. I'm a fairly frank and upfront person (wait...really?). If you're being a little punk and it's enough that I feel that it will affect me, I will say something to you. And if I disagree with you, I will find a way to politely let you know how I feel IF I want to talk about it. If I'm not willing to talk, I will just shut the fuck up.
If you are just bothering me, I weigh the benefits of saying anything or just letting it go. Usually the criteria consist of one of two things:
1. Will my saying something really help this person or improve my relationship with this person?
2. Does it really need to be said or will it just cause more trouble if I speak up?
Generally the first one would be, for instance, if someone gets a really bad haircut or if their perfume is overpowering. And even in these cases, I would weigh my feedback with their feelings. Do they seem on the fence about their haircut and my feedback will help them determine if they're going to do it again? Then yes, I may say that it's not their best haircut. But...Are they super in love with it and just fucking adore it? Then no, I'm not going to shit on their dreams.
For the second bullet point, I generally only do those things if I may not be too worried about the friendship with being retained because a person has crossed so far into my no bullshit on that I just don't care anymore or b. If they are being directly ticket to me. If someone is being a cunt to me I will tell them that they're being a cunt. And a third a bonus point, I have something good to say to you, then I'm going to tell you. Even if the thing is that I'm super jelly because you are so much more beautiful and successful than me and I kind of hate you sometimes. Because, honestly, my friend to know me should know that's a compliment. And my friend to get too sensitive? Maybe I should rethink having them as friends.
And for myself, I should really hope that if you have something to say to me that you say it… To me… Or, make sure I never hear it. If you want to talk shit about me that's your prerogative but I can't stop you but if you don't have the lady balls to come up and say it to my face, then I don't want you to say it to me anonymously. Anonymity gives people A false sense of security that, I really don't think they should be allowed to have in a friendship. In a job or professional relationship, I get it. You have jobs you don't love because you need the money because you need to health benefits and that's what people do. But you have friendships directly to enrich your life's so if you're friends with toxic people that feel the need to complain to you anonymously about yourself and can't even own up to their own feelings, I'm not people that are really going to enrich your life anyway. They may just be hangers on my friends with you because you do something for them, because they think they can get influence in being your friend. And that, is a super shitty friendship and not worth the two fucks that I have to give to it.
So, I have to say, I will not be doing Serata because it's the trendy thing to do right now. I will say, that if you want to talk to me I am open. If you want to say bad shit about me, that's fine, just know that if you do it to my face you would get a better response if you can approach it in a polite and logical way. If you just want to spew vitriol, I hear there's probably a website for that.
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